Late night blab

I’m tired of being used and abused, not psychically but mentally. Tired of being understanding, cool, calm and collected, being played like a yo-yo.

Ef that! Hate how I don’t have it in me to be spiteful. Hate how I allow them to treat me the way they do. Sickening at times. I’m done. I know I always say this. But this time I realize it’s my fault, I chose to let it happen, over and over again. Smh.

I’m in such a better place now mentally with myself. Yes I still have my days in which I struggle but when I’m past it, believe me, I feel unstoppable. I’ve grown so much in the past few months. That I sit here in bed and look back at where I was months back and I can honestly say, I healed, accepted and let go of a lot. It’s all about learning and not repeating the same lessons.

I’m allowing myself to, for the first time, to set my emotions aside, grow from my mistakes, regret nothing nor blame anyone. To this very day I look back and it’s crazy how much and what I’ve been through and still I stand, strong, powerful, and on my way to being successful, with the most important tool, self love.

It sad to say that I thought I loved people who I had by my side… But how could I have claimed to love a stranger when I didn’t even love myself? I’ve learned that there’s nothing more beautiful than loving yourself. I don’t NEED a man to make happy, I WANT one. There’s a difference. And it took me all this time to figure that out. But hey it’s better than never…

Goodnight everyone